What Does One Say...

My handy friend and I were startled when upon returning to my flat late Friday evening, the door stood wide open. After ascertaining that there were no burglars about, I entered to find everything in order. As she and I had both heard the door slam when leaving, this was perplexing. She immediately suggested changing the locks, and offered to pick them up the next time she was out. I gratefully concurred and offered to reimburse the cost.

As I awaited my weekly grocery delivery today, the phone rang and my friend asked if I would be home so she could come and install the new deadbolt. I agreed and the deed was done, meowing feline and grocery arrival notwithstanding. My friend, however, encountered dry rot in the door frame and offered the optimistic view that perhaps it was throughout and I ought not be concerned. She then ventured the opinion that I perhaps consider moving to one of those facilities better suited to my needs, and this isn't the first mention she's made, either.

I found myself biting my tongue...

She is obviously ignorant of the fact that people with disabilities in this country have fought for the right to live independently and that most of us are unfortunately stuck in housing that we cannot afford to modify extensively due to cost. There is a shortage of wheelchair-modified housing. Additionally, this modification  is expensive and there is no magic fairy or prince's trust here. This is America and grants for such endeavors are and always have been in short supply. Veterans disabled by the war effort can get money from the federal government via the Veteran's Administration up to $70, 000. Since our wormy politicians and equally "astute" congresspersons ask the military to risk lives in foreign conflicts, though I object to this use of my tax dollars, I also feel these men and women deserve this help when it is needed.

The rest of us have to slog along the best we can, but why, I wonder, do people think that life "in a facility" is actually preferable to one's independence?

Of one thing I am certain. The next time this supposedly well-intentioned friend opens her mouth with this remark, she will get an earful, as I have had quite enough. I am neither an invalid nor am I helpless to think and make decisions for myself. I can bathe, dress and feed myself, take care of animals, manage bills, organise appointments, outings and transport and go places alone as well as with others.

At this point, I am wondering how best to offer a tactful but firm response...

Until Next Time...