Have you ever noticed someone approaching you on a public street and thought,"Oh, no!" This happened to me just the other day as I was awaiting a delivery. Apparently, it is no longer satisfactory for people to simply extend a friendly wave as they return to their flat...
This particular person decided to come over and chat me up. Introductions were made and then she began nattering about staying up through the wee hours organizing stuff to mail to her daughter in another state, her husband having died and her lack of vitamin D and refusal to take the recommended supplement, her lovely landlord, blah, blah, blah. This was all said in the face of very bland "Oh really," and "oh my."Then, seeing my wheelchair, she said, "You can walk still?" My answer, though none of her business, was not anymore, as in how would she have drawn that conclusion unless her toxic gossip of a neighbor said something about the past?
The neighbors here love to prattle, even when their prattle is stupid, misinformed or malicious, the downside of condominium living. I would feel sorry for her as she is probably lonely if I wasn't also feeling a bit treaded upon by someone not entitled to any personal information about me at all. The fact is, that beyond civil acknowledgement, I don't interact with the newest crop of neighbors in this building. The one directly above me was a bit too friendly when she first arrived and attempted to immediately insinuate herself into my life by saying she would be happy to do anything if I needed it despite just having known me for two minutes. She then decided that she wanted to know more and when I did not return the information, she was put out. She disclosed that white people have been screwed over by affirmative action, an idea I find ignorant and racist.
The gentleman across from me is, like me, quiet, and not a busy body. He says a quick hello if seen outside and leaves it at that. The others, a couple, also keep to themselves.
The little lady from the building next door revealed a lot to me without meaning to. She apparently talks to people who run their mouths and will not be talking to me again as I intend to avoid her and will say nothing remotely personal. Any further inquiries will be met with a firm "none of your business."
This from someone now known as, "The lady with the dead guy in her apartment," which references a tragic event from 2013.
Cheers!
28 comments:
I absolutely do not miss living in a condo one bit. 12 years of hiding from neighbours and dreading when I accidentally ran into them in the hallways.
I give you a cloak of invisibility. xo
One of my biggest pet peeves is busybodies. It drives me nuts when people don't mind their own business or when they gossip or when they stick their nose where it doesn't belong or when they have the gall to ask really personal questions. And when they say dumb and inappropriate things. I swear some people lack a tact gene!
You sound like an introvert :) Like me! I'm not always in the mood to be chatted up. I swear sometimes I look out my window before I head out to make sure there isn't some chatty neighbour out there.
I'm not fond of busybodies. Sorry you have them in your building.
i am bearing lots of pressure from my surrounding for being not social enough and i cannot pretend if i do not like gatherings where people talk that really sounds meaningless and inappropriate to me.Since i moved here[almost ten years] ladies from around start coming over and i well comed them but did not visited more than once as just being introduced to each other is okay .they start reacting like angry group of mad people who have among them someone who does not belong to them and should go some where else .
it took almost few years to get them back to their business and i am grateful for this of God.
Some people just do not know when they're crossing a line and becoming overly familiar. I mean, I don't mind neighborly friendliness, but I can't stand people who talk and talk.
Busybodies are very hard to deal with, aren't they? I don't like to be rude so end up dodging them.
My dear e,
At last, I managed to leave you a comment on this post. Earlier when I tried, the comment box didn't come up.
Oh my dear, your neighbours sound like characters from E. F. Benson's "Mapp and Lucia" stories. I think that there is a fine line between being courteous and neighbourly and being a nuisance and tiresome. While I am always polite to my neighbours, most of the time I live like a hermit. So, they leave me in peace since they knew that I treasure peace and solitude.
When I was living in the city, I remember there was one neighbour who was a retired drama teacher with an immense longing for some company. She used to float about in the communal area of the flat in her romantic dresses, persuading people to come and have tea with her in her flat and listen to her stories of her life. I accepted her (quite a number of my neighbours did in the same way) as one of the necessary regrets of life, comparable to a visit to the seaside on a rainy day.
Best wishes, ASD
Some people have no filter! It sounds like you know how to handle them, though. Maybe they will get the message over time.
This is the reason we moved into the country. No neighbours. But I think I'm one of those people that would talk too much and you'd be looking at me and going "oh no!". :D
One of my next door neighbors is a gossip. I just nod and smile and am careful about what I reveal about myself!
I hate the prying of gossips. There are too many in my village who are so Christian in the worst way and do so much harm it makes my brain bleed. With u in spirit. I use cuss words and they're so busy being appalled at me it makes me laugh internally. 😊
XO
WWW
Alas, I can relate and I wish I could manage or afford a small house but it isn't practical for my situation...Thanks for the cloak of invisibility!
Me either!
I agree and will avoid this one!
I too prefer to live like a hermit...Fortunately, none of the neighbors come knocking...too busy gossiping!
I have become so weary of people's foolishness over the years that I have no compunction about telling them to mind their own business.
Dear Joey, My impression is that you are a nice person. Your interest in books and music would be enough to talk about even if you did not want to talk of more personal things.
I am completely an introvert. At this point, a cave would be nice!
They are everywhere here, unfortunately!
I am sorry they were angry at you and glad that now they no longer bother you. Thanks for coming to my blog.
That is the best strategy for a communal setting...Does your neighbor not notice your reticence?
Good for you, nothing like a well-aimed curse word to make a busybody flee in horror. Perhaps I'll try that!
I do enjoy a good chat with people, as long as it is friendly and constructive. But I hate gossip and "holier than thou" people and do my best to avoid them.
Some people have no idea about personal space, let alone engaging their brains before they put their mouths into gear.
Ms Soup
I agree!
Unfortunately very true and can be said about more than one's neighbors!
Dear me, that must have been a very uncomfortable experience.
Greetings from London.
Indeed so. Best to you!
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