The weekend got off to a great start on Friday as I made my way across town in the rain for a concert given by my former Cantor and her accompanist, a talented, classically trained pianist who is also a librarian.
The concert, which lasted just over an hour, featured works from women composers from the late Middle Ages through the present. Held at the Friday Morning Musicale, a 1920's style music club with its own auditorium, kitchen and meeting/dining room that is part of the Woman's Club, it was largely attended by Women's Club members with a scattering of friends from other places. You can see and find out more about the Musicale here: http://fridaymorningmusicale.com.
My former Cantor has a rich mezzo soprano voice and an extensive background in music. Prior to her career in the cantorial world, she worked in entertainment and as a child, appeared in a well known film. She is also a gifted teacher, having provided her former choir members, including myself, many hours of vocal exercise, explanations of prayers and histories behind pieces of music or the events surrounding them. All of these things helped make me a better singer as well as making the many hours of choir rehearsals worthwhile. She is also one of the nicest women I've ever met.
As for the concert, each piece was accompanied by the composer's biographical information and a brief history of her works and the piece played or sung. Beyond the social and economic restrictions placed upon women, some of these composers faced obstacles related to race or disability.
I enjoy supporting events such as this both because they add to my own enrichment while contributing to music education at the community level, something important that is often not accorded sufficient attention or resources.
Saturday found me at the small Reform temple in my neighbourhood for services and a discussion of the congregation's Shiva resources for those mourning the loss of a loved one. I am still finding my way in this new congregation, but every time I go to a service or any other event, I am impressed with how active they are and the friendliness of the place.
Brunch with friends Sunday morning was lovely, both for catching up and saying goodbye. While one of my friends from this bunch is beginning life in a new city with a new partner, something I am happy about on her behalf, I will hopefully see her once more before her departure in a month's time. The others I may see now and then, a change from our weekly contact since I now attend services elsewhere.
Yesterday afternoon I visited a friend's nonagenarian parents, one of whom is terminally ill and receiving hospice services. Despite the circumstances, we had lively conversation and a wonderful time. Both have become very special to me. When I asked my friend whether his mother would live to see her seventieth wedding anniversary in June, he admitted that this is not likely and his mother acknowledged that she feels different and has been sleeping more in the last week. This news brought me up short, but I also marvel at the differences among families. My friend and his siblings and other relations truly appear to understand the value of spending time together and time with their parents. They can speak openly about their mother's dying, something my own mother and her family members did not face well at all.
I remember all too well the conversations I spent begging my mother for permission to speak with her physicians when I suspected she might be dying and having to resort to speaking with her closest friends behind her back. By the time she was convinced to write a letter authorizing the doctors to speak with me, her death was only days away, something that took me and her doctors by surprise but which was probably in retrospect, better than lingering or dying in a modern hospital.
Small mercies...
3 comments:
What a joy to have so many circles of friends....and in reference to the mother of your friend my mother hopes to die unexpectedly, not to drag out her last days being 'cared for'.
Mark you, when she had her hip replacement when she was 95 her specialist told her she was good for another ten years....and she intends to enjoy those years to the limit of her ability.
The Friday Morning Musicale! I haven't thought of that place in years and years. I'm glad it's still open and being used. I saw a WMNF concert there back in 1990 or so. I remember it well.
It IS great that your friend's family members are able to be open about what they're experiencing. My parents aren't particularly forthcoming about their health.
It's good that they can speak openly about their mother's dying, instead of people pussyfooting around and pretending it isn't happening. What purpose is served by denying the reality? My father died of lung cancer but I never saw him before his death as we had been estranged for years. He had some inexplicable animosity towards me - I think he just didn't like me being my own self and not taking after him.
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